I’m not afraid to let people know who I am. In fact, I sometimes feel like I am too open about my insecurities, doubts, and struggles.
And yet — I find myself telling it like it is: to current clients and trusted advisers and also to potential clients, to team members, to people I’ve just met and people I’ve known longer.
I’m not comfortable projecting an unrealistic image: confident, powerful CEO (ha!) Instead, I prefer to be myself: eager, enthusiastic, sometimes confident, sometimes insecure. I am growing — I can see how far I’ve come and I can also see many areas of opportunity (read: weaknesses.)
Sometimes, I share something, letting my insecure side peek through, and wish I could stuff the words right back into my mouth. Is it really okay to let you know I don’t have it all put together?
Except: this is who I am. Do you still want to work with me? Great — because I really like you and I want to work with you, too.
I think the truth is that
- even if you don’t tell me, you have insecurities, too.
- you can sometimes see your weaknesses more clearly than you can your strengths.
- your confidence is, though not exactly put on like a suit and tie , elusive at times. It’s something you occasionally have to muster up.
I am the founder/CEO of the Weaving Influence team, the author of Reach: Creating the Biggest Possible Audience for Your Message, Book, or Cause, and the host of the Book Marketing Action Podcast. I’m a wife and mom of three kids, and I enjoy running, reading, writing, coffee, and dark chocolate.
The folks I’ve most enjoyed working with are invariably the most authentic. It’s challenging to leave the masks behind, but it’s also rewarding, not just in business, but in being able to live one life. At work, at play, at home. It’s all integrated because you’re just one person in all those roles.
Powerful stuff, Becky!
It seems like there’s been a big buzz lately about being “real.” About showing the real insecure us, the parts with flaws and weaknesses. Because then people can relate. They know you’re not putting on a front. They know that “what you see is what you get.”
(On the other hand, discretion is key. Some things should just be kept to yourself.)
We get tired of the perfect – since nobody really is anyway. Thanks for being imperfect.
I love this post. Your authenticity & vulnerability are two of my favorite things about you.
Admittedly though, the list of my favorite things about you is very long!
Your vulnerability, Becky, is one of the many attributes I admire most in you. I think it is a major component in making strong lasting relationships!
Great post!! It’s so important to be authentic and you do it beautifully!!
Loved this post! I value authenticity and “real-ness” a lot. What I notice is that when I am not totally authentic, it REALLY shows…as a side-note, you are so very good at helping people see their positive sides!
I’ve always been confident in my abilities and try to open my mouth ONLY when I’m 100% sure what I’m saying is practical advice.
I do, however, NOT feel ashamed of admitting I do not know anything about a certain topic or conversation. I’d then proceed to ask, and ask, and ask some more to get as much info as I can to formulate a point of view that is goes with my personal beliefs.
I don’t believe being open is solely about emotion; it has more to do with the fact that you know where you stand, and are willing to share your current position with others. And learn from those around you.
Great post Becky. I have learned throughout my career as a leader how important it is to be authentic and transparent but it was only recently that I started to act on what I knew was right all along. I have been able to add much value to clients, friends and family by sharing my story and helping others to share theirs. Keep doing what you are doing – It works!
This is why your blog is one I choose to read on a continuous basis. Other blogs I read have the same feel….they are real and authentic. I am about to dive into my blog and get going and being real is a priority for me. It is not always easy with the things I will be talking about but it is necessary. People have to know you are real and have walked through struggles. Thank you for your vulnerability!
Becky – You already know you’re speaking my language, and it is your ‘realness’ and totality of who you are that draws others in, creating a lasting basis for trust, whether in friendship or business. Wonderful post!
Becky – You already know you’re speaking my language, and it is your ‘realness’ and totality of who you are that draws others in, creating a lasting basis for trust, whether in friendship or business. Wonderful post!