Permission to Move On

Permission to Move On

A friend called me on Monday afternoon. He knew I’d hit a few rough and bumpy patches lately.

He listened to me moan and whine and then he said some pretty powerful words. “You have 24 hours to feel bad about this — eat a lot of ice cream, whatever it is that you do when you’re feeling bad. When the 24 hours are over, you have to move on.”

24 hours. My friend gave me permission to wallow for 24 hours.

(What I didn’t tell him is that I’ve been moping for two weeks!)

I needed permission.

I needed permission to stay in bed past five am, permission to sit at my desk eating trail mix by the handful.

More than that, I needed permission — direction — to put a stop to my self-centered self-pity.

I needed permission to move on.

I needed permission to look to what’s ahead. To leave the mistakes in the past.

I needed permission to make better decisions moving forward. I needed permission to envision a new future.

I needed permission to move on.

My friend gave me permission.

What I’m finding is that in order for me to move on, I have to let go.

In order to move on, I must give others permission to move on to what’s next in their lives —  not making it about me, but about them: their freedom, happiness, right to choose.

They don’t need my permission, of course.

It’s a paradox like forgiveness, which is a gift to the one forgiving perhaps more than the one forgiven.

In the mental discipline of my granting permission to you, I am giving myself permission.

In giving permission to you to move on, I am giving myself the same permission.

What frees you, frees me.

You have permission to move on. I’m on my way.

photo credit Alex Pearson

Filed As:  closure, permission

About Becky Robinson

I am the owner of Weaving Influence and the leader of the Weaving Influence team. We help authors and thought leaders grow their online influence. I am also a wife and mom of three daughters, and I enjoy running, reading, writing, a good cup of coffee, and dark chocolate.

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What People Are Saying

  • Amen – awesome advice. We all move on. Sometimes with excited anticipation, sometimes begrudginly dragging our feet, sometimes sucking our thumb and dragging our security blanket. We stil move on and we are so much better for it. “Forgetting those things which are behind and pressing on to our higher calling which we inherited through gifts of the Father at birth because we have a prize waiting for us if we keep striving toward that goal.” My paaphrase of Philippians 3:12-14

  • I believe the best permissions are the ones we give ourselves. We don’t need others to enable us to live our lives more fully.

  • As they say, fall down, get up, step over your obstacle and march on.

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